Alright, this posting is dedicated to a Q & A of frequently asked questions I am getting …. I love chatting with people so don’t let this hinder you from asking similar questions, but here’s a one stop shop of details.
Q: How are you doing?
A: I am good. : – ) I think having the end of August and last month “off” gave me a chance to really decompress all that’s been going on. It’s been a little harder than I imagined, as sometimes time “off” gives you too much time to think. But I think it’s all been healthy time to process and unwind from what’s been a busy last year/few years. Sometimes in this process, you are so busy going from one cycle day to the next, one checklist and medical treatment to the other, that you lose track and forgot about giving yourself time to grieve the difficulties as well. So this has been a healthy break, but I am also ready for my brain to be pre-occupied again.
Q: When does your leave start? Are you still working right now?
A: Yes, I am still working currently! My leave officially begins on November 19th and will go through January 2nd. I am busy getting ready for that leave of absence now!
Q: Are you on any medication right now?
A: Yep! It’s kind of bizarre but in order for you to prep for IVF, they have you start on birth control pills to begin the ovary suppression progress. Of course many women are on birth control pills and it’s a totally normal med to be on. My body is taking some time to adjust to it, as it regularly provides different hormones to my body than I am used to dealing with. But I am feeling good. I will be on these for about 5-6 weeks as we get ready for the “real” meds to start.
Q: How do you stay so strong?
A: I don’t, always. :) Some days are tough. But I have an amazing support system around me and my relationship with Christ gets me through the most difficult days. But I do have pouty tantrums. I do feel really discouraged at times. And I do let myself cry. But at the end of the day, for me, it’s about picking myself back up and moving forward with my head held high.
Q: What’s one of the most helpful things someone said to you?
A: It’s actually something my sister-in-law Monica said to me once. (And I don’t even know that she knew how helpful it was for me!). She told me that it was okay to for me to put my chin down because she was holding hers up for me. It felt like I was given permission to be sad and that it was okay. And that some days, those around me are the ones that have to be strong for me. I still think about that to this day and just love the thought, meaning, and promise behind it.
Q: Is it hard for you to be around babies and kids?
A: Nope! I truly feel like this is a special ability God has granted me with. I was thinking about this the other day and I believe a lot of it has to do with the fact that I don’t know differently. Meaning, this process has taken me so long and I have seen SO many women get pregnant, have their 1st, 2nd, 3rd child … been to more baby showers than I can count and celebrated an enormous amount of pregnancies each year…to carry that sadness with me to each pregnancy would be too exhausting. Knowing how hard it can be to get pregnant, I have nothing but joy for those who conceive a child, knowing that THAT is the baby THEY are supposed to have.
Q: What can I do? I feel like a broken record just telling you I am praying for you.
A: Keep up the prayers! Truthfully there is nothing I expect anyone to do. I always appreciate encouragement – texts, calls, emails, cards … those touch me in a very special way. I was watching Parenthood last week (LOVE THAT SHOW!) and one of the characters was talking about a support system when someone goes through something tough, like cancer or a sickness. She said at first, everyone is so supportive, gathers around you, encourages, prays, helps in many ways … and then it gets old and they drop off. It isn’t “new” anymore. That can be the case with infertility too. It feels like a broken record of “not this month … again!”. The disappointment doesn’t get easier though so the continued thoughts mean SO much. And if you ever feel like “doing” something – come over with a good movie, a fancy drink and some Chinese take-out and just be with me. Just having someone that listens to my word vomit is incredibly helpful, no matter what season!
Q: What are you doing for yourself to prep for IVF?
A: One of my main concerns right now is continuing to get at and be at a healthy weight. On September 4th, I set a goal for myself to lose 25 pounds by November 18th. Totally possible for me with some real dedication. It equals about 10 pounds a month for Sept and October and 5 pounds in November. This morning, the 3rd, I hit my 10 pound mark for the last month. YEAH! I know that being healthy, eating right, and taking care of myself is one of the best things I can do for myself right now.
So with that said, maybe I should correct my above answer re: Chinese take-out and say a salad.
Q: Are you watching Revenge?
A: Um, YES! I love that show! And Grey’s Anatomy, Vampire Diaries, Parenthood (as referenced above), America’s Next Top Model on occasion and whatever other show I can fit in. Although singing competitions have fallen off my list this year. Sorrrrrrry #The Voice lovers.
Q: What’s been your favorite verse throughout all this?
A: I have a couple:
Philippians 4:6 “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.”
James 1:2-4 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
Isaiah 41:10 “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.”
Q: What’s your favorite thing about fall?
A: Easy. Boots, scarves, and pumpkin spiced lattes.
Enjoy your day my friends! Thanks for stopping by. : – )