The other night I woke up in the middle of the night with a clear message placed on my heart.
In this season, I am not just being called to survive. I am being called to thrive.
Thrive. Not survive.
Whoa. It was one of the most empowering visualizations I have had and I know it was placed on my heart by God. The idea of taking what I am a little anxious and nervous about, and turn it into a beautiful process is energizing.
Survive: to endure or live through
Thrive: to grow strongly and flourish
My heart has been changed to focus on embracing what’s ahead of me, to grow stronger in it and to flourish through this experience. Of course some days, yes, I will just need to endure the shots and the sickness, but I will be gladly receiving the experience each day.
God has such a funny way of reminding us that He is there and listening, doesn’t He? I was feeling a little overwhelmed the last time I posted – then this vision of thriving was placed on my heart. I continue to rely so much on the blessings of encouragement that God uses YOU for. When I am down, it’s like magic, a card appears in my mailbox. Or when I am worrying about getting through the day, bam, someone drops of coffee. If I need to refocus or am letting my mind wandering down a “what if” road, DING, my phone lights up with a text message with the PERFECT verse or message. I am overwhelmed with how much God uses amazing people in my life to remind me that not only will I have Him and Josh getting me through each day, but I will have all of you.
I just have to share some really amazing blessings that He has used others to touch my heart with this week:
- My sister in law made me some amazing soup, which I was able to take for lunch and enjoy not only having to pack a lunch, but was the best meal to have while I was sick. Truthfully, other than my mom, I couldn’t tell you the last time someone sent me a meal! Such a blessing.
- I went to my mailbox at work and pulled out tons of envelopes to sort through – and there was a handwritten card mailed to my work from another co-worker at a different site with the kindest words of thoughtfulness, encouragement, and well wishes on this journey.
- My parents took Cali for the day on Thursday so I could enjoy a night out with some girlfriends and didn’t have to worry about my dog being home all day by herself. Not only that but she was fed, walked and good and tired when Mama picked her up.
- I visited with Josh’s Grandma one evening and when I walked in to her apartment, she had a homemade piece of pie on the counter waiting for me on the plate, with a wide variety of teas next to it, ready to make me a cup and sit me down at the table. Such a thoughtful, personal gesture.
- My sister brought me over a pair of my favorite socks to wear. A small gesture that literally came hours after I thought, “I really just want a soft pair of comfy socks to wear.” (And a sweet sacrifice for a college student!)
- After shopping around and ordering prescriptions, I had a friend who went through IVF and had some left over meds, the same ones that I needed to order, text me that she felt a “profound need to give them to me” … literally saving us $560. This was right after putting together a spreadsheet of costs and feeling a little overwhelmed. SUCH a Godsend!
- I received numerous texts and Facebook messages from friends and acquaintances I literally have not seen or talked to in years, letting me know I was in their prayers DAILY and they have been following our story and wanted me to know they are supporting Josh and I in this next step. The thought of that is humbling.
- I had my mother-in-laws Bible study pray for my health this week … after fighting a miserable sinus infection, to have people lifting me up in prayer without even asking was awesome.
- A coworker stopped and brought me a Caribou and refused to let me pay him back. The mocha was incredibly needed after 4 nights of minimal, miserable sleep.
- My incredible Kid-O-Deo Team Coach group asked to pray and lay hands over me this morning, lifting us up, praying a Sun Stands Still prayer for this journey and our future child. And last night, my sister and I sat in my living room and prayer together with words that touched my heart in a special way.
- My Aunt, Uncle and cousins sent me the most incredible, surprise care package today with the most incredible, personalized gifts in there – snuggly pajamas, gift cards for meals, socks, tea, Clinique body butter, notecards, lipgloss … the list continues. And my cousin included a very special Winnie the Pooh stuffed animal that he searched high and low to find, which has a special meaning between us. And the words that were written on the cards and notes not only had me in complete tears, but overwhelmed me with gratitude for such supportive and caring family members.
- My friend Julie made me TONS of Christmas cd’s this week – which is something I love to listen to during the winter and freshening up the playlist is so exciting!
I am certain I have forgotten many things – and that doesn’t mean they are any less special or meaningful. These are just examples of how God continues to use thoughtful, caring people to encourage me along the way. As someone whose love language is words of affirmation and thoughtful gifts (not just monetary!), I continue to feel SO loved, treasured and supported. It’s all overwhelming in a good way – it’s very humbling to be cared for and loved by so many. To know of others sacrifices to show they care – the time to write a text on a tiny screened phone, or make a meal, or resources, time and thought to purchase a special gift…. my heart will never be able to thank you all for the ways you touch my life each day! With your support, God’s grace, and my determination, I am ready to thrive.