The emails and texts are common: “My friend just had a miscarriage. What should I say or do?” I absolutely love the compassion these women express as they attempt to stand next to their grieving friend. I do my best to reply, but I know my experiences are unique and may not be the same as everyone.
So I opened the question up and connected with over 100 women who’ve stood in these difficult shoes too. We began to have a rich conversation on what was helpful and what wasn’t. I then was given the opportunity to write about that conversation and share these common threads, to help provide a resource for the future when these tragic and heart wrenching circumstances occur.
If you are looking for more information on how to help a friend suffering through a miscarriage, I’d encourage you to check out this article I wrote.
Click here for the article: 10 Tips to Help Someone Going Through a Miscarriage
Miscarriage talk is hard, often taboo, and it doesn’t make grief any easier. The support of others brings unspeakable healing. What about you? Did something not make the list that should have? Comment below and share with us what helped (or didn’t).
A special thanks to all of the women who vulnerably shared their grief, experiences, advice and words with me. While nothing is the same as holding your baby in your arms, the help and support you have been able to pass on as a result of your pain and grief is meaningful. Thank you.
Trials Bring Joy 
Thanks for sharing your article! It can be very hard to know what to say to someone who has experienced this kind of loss, even if you’ve been through it yourself.
This list is absolutely perfect. I’m going to save it since I have unfortunately become the miscarriage expert in my group of friends. My friends’ reactions to my miscarriages have really re-shaped how I see some of them. I don’t know if that’s “right” per se, but It really has. For example, someone I considered really tender before has been absolutely terrible, while someone who has a reputation for being more cold remembered the due date for my first pregnancy and sent me the sweetest text. It also has created brand new relationships. Some of the women at church who are still asking me how I’m doing and are letting me know they’ve been praying for me even 2 months after my most recent loss are women I had never even been introduced to before.
What a fantastic list! Shared this article on FB.
I have never gone through this, but I appreciate your willingness to share from your perspective. It truly helps us who don’t know