friday favorites – february 13.

February 13, 2015February 13, 20158 Comments

Another Friday is upon us. (A Friday the 13th nonetheless!) Time for some Friday Favorites, here we go!

Favorite Thing I Am Looking Forward To: Valentine’s Day celebrations! I have a hot date tonight at one of my favorite restaurants with this stud. Yes, this is a picture from our first date, which occurred 12 years ago on Valentine’s Day. We look like babies. Ah, I love this man. Tomorrow night we are enjoying a quiet night in with our pup and fondue. I am grateful to have him standing by my side through thick and thin. Love you Josh!

Favorite Moment: Thank you all for the amazing support on my Fertility Authority ‘5 Things You Want to Tell Your Fertile Friend’ post this week. The response has been overwhelming and I am so thankful it has made many of you feel validated in your emotions and has given you a platform to start some open and honest conversations with friends and families. Thank you to everyone who shared it, clicked on it and read it. That being said, I am sorry so many of you understand what this feels like, but am always grateful when I can share my heart and it makes sense to others.

Favorite Show: My nieces were on fire the other day, putting on several puppet shows for me. Scarlett’s imagination is hilarious and it’s a really good thing that the magic butterfly saved Cali from the evil witch. (Said witch puppet also played the role of the auntie which was a little concerning, but the girls assured me that the puppet was only imaginary and that it could be a witch or an auntie.)

Favorite Celebration: My dear friend Alicia’s baby shower! Without sharing her story, let’s just say it’s fun to celebrate the upcoming arrival of a longley anticipated baby. She’s glowing and radiant! (Oh and my bib won the “best bib” prize and I am now own the cutest Burt’s Bee’s Tips and Toes kit. Yay!)

Favorite Spotting: I saw this sign at Barnes and Nobles this weekend and loved the reminder, while also chuckling about how true it is.

Favorite Gluten Free Product: This Canyon Bread! Goodness, SO GOOD! Target has it on Cartwheel for 20% off at the moment and I tried the rye bread this week and it made me drool. I have always liked Udi’s but this feels and tastes like real, soft bread. If you are gluten free, give this brand a try! It’s in the bakery section of stores, not in the freezer section.

Favorite Winners: Thank you to everyone who entered this weeks double giveaway! I am excited to share the winners! Congratulations to Sara F. who won a copy of Where Did All the Storks Go and Dawn R. who won the TTC Boost Bundle and BFP bundles from Fairhaven Health! I will contact you both for shipping information. Didn’t win this time? Stay tuned for next week where we have another giveaway featured with our next Q & A post!

Favorite Funnies:

Have a great weekend friends, see you next week! XO!

5 things you want to tell your fertile friend.

February 11, 2015February 12, 201511 Comments

Ever been there? That place, that moment, when you look around the room and realize you are the only person without kids? The conversation drifts in and out as you refresh your thinking “was up all night with johnny .. so tired .. love when they snuggle all morning … watched too much tv yesterday with them … need a night out … love them more than I knew was possible … love the boppy, although I would recommend … ” You catch snippets of conversation, knowing that you have nothing to offer and for just a moment, you want to weigh in and let your friends know these 5 things …

{click here to continue reading}

Thanks for clicking to continue reading and supporting my writing at Fertility Authority! Please feel free to share this post as much as you can within the next month – your views matter! And I’d love to have you weigh in and share what you wish you could tell your friends with kids – comment there or here!

Also, it’s not too late to enter the giveaway for your chance to win a copy of Where Have All the Storks Gone? A His and Hers Guide to Infertility by Michelle and Chris Miller or a fertility pack with a TTC Boost Bundle for Her and a BFP Test Strip Little Bundle. Read the previous post to enter or Click Here: a Rafflecopter giveaway.

See you Friday to announce the giveaway winners and share some Friday Favorites!

Q & A part 1

February 10, 2015February 10, 201528 Comments

I am so excited to launch this Question and Answers series this month, which will be combined with questions you have sent in and featuring some fun giveaways too! (2 packages today, more to come!) Thanks to everyone who submitted a question – if you don’t see your question answered in this post, know that there will be 3 parts so yours will make its way to being answered. Also, if you didn’t get a chance to send in your question, it’s not too late! Check out the Contact page for the best way to connect or leave a question in the comments below.

Here we go!

Q: Do you have any fiction book recommendations that you enjoyed that touch on infertility in some way?

A: I know many of you went out and read What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty and have shared that you loved it! I’m so glad! I have three other books that stand out as a good read with infertility story lines. The first is The Baby Trail by Sinead Moriarty. It is written by a British author and I found it to be hilarious. There are 2 follow up books to this book character and I liked all of them. But this first one is especially relatable to many and I found myself laughing out loud and feeling incredibly understood at the same time. The other book is Barefoot by Elin Hildebrand. While the infertility story line isn’t the predominate feature, it does touch on the emotions and uses language many of us would be familiar with. The third and last one is The Things We Do For Love by Kristin Hannah. I loved this one too. All three of these are non-Christian books so there are mild/moderate adult language and elements, but nothing I wouldn’t allow my Grandma Jones to read. (Hi Grandma Jones!)

Q: What about non-fiction books? Anything that touches on infertility that’s great?

A: YES! So many I love. The first is Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist. If you have read my blog for any period of time and haven’t gotten this yet, please do! Her personal essays touch on miscarriage and struggles to conceive in a Godly way (however is not the focus of the book) and this is one of my favorite books of encouragement, relate-ability and hope. (UPDATE: And today only, the e-book is 0.99 on Amazon and Barnes and Nobles!)

The second is a book I recently read called Where Have All the Storks Gone? A His and Hers Guide to Infertility by Michelle and Chris Miller. This book is a funny, touching read, written from both her perspective and his. Her point of view talks a lot about the first steps you take when you learn you are fertility challenged, a great list of questions to bring to your OB/RE, some great advice on how to ignore the comments you wish people didn’t say and what you can expect with medicated cycles and IVF. Michelle does a GREAT job with this! And then the “his” perspective – Chris talks openly and candidly about things like preparing for the changes to the “just having sex” lifestyle, learning how to read semen analysis results, the lessons he has learned as a husband throughout the journey and touching on how he keeps his sanity and stays married through it all. I am SO glad I got to read this book – it was a lot of “you too!?”. It’s funny and touching and I will go ahead and let you know, has a great ending. In fact, I like this book so much that the publisher and I are hosting a GIVEAWAY for you to win a chance to get this book for free! Yeah! Enter below – the contest will end this Friday and the winner will be announced with Friday Favorites. Be sure to enter! (If you don’t win, I would still highly suggest grabbing this book. You can find all the ordering details on their website – www.wherehaveallthestorksgone.com) (This too is written from a secular perspective but is very tasteful!)

The third book is Every Drunken Cheerleader – Why Not Me? By Kristine Ireland Waits. This book is HILARIOUS. It’s written by a Christian author and I am so encouraged and touched by this challenging book. It’s written so that you can relate to it if you are struggling with infertility but also is an amazing resource for those who are supporting someone who is struggling with infertility. There’s an entire chapter (or two) that answers the questions they have like How can I help? What should I do? What shouldn’t I do? When and what should I ask about? How can I best support my friend during this? If I could give a copy to everyone I know, I would. This book is fabulous.

I have many other book suggestions listed under my Reading Resources page so check those out too!

Q: What helps you get though the 2 week wait? Are there any fun activities that help you get your mind off of things?

A: Let me just start by saying 2 week waits (2WW) suck. Never in my life have I known 14 days to take so painfully long. That being said, somehow they do pass. During this time I like to pretend like it’s not happening, while also recording every detail of every day. Makes sense right? I briefly write in my journal each day and this actually has helped keep me sane when reflecting back and reading other 2WW entries. I realize I am crazy EVERY 2WW which somehow brings comfort that this wait isn’t extra special. But anyways, to pass the days, I love to pack my days full of distractions. Coffees with friends (decaf of course!), trips to local and free museums or zoo’s, movie nights, girls days, mall walking (but no buying anything! Never clothes shop under the effects of progesterone.), painting my nails, and doing some gentle yoga (or swimming if you have that option). Things I DON’T suggest you do – Google. STAY OFF OF FORUMS, CHAT ROOMS, AND 2WW symptom websites. I repeat, DO. NOT. DO. THIS. You will drive yourself batty and set yourself up for waves of pointless emotions because you can’t truly count yourself out of this cycle at 3dpo (3 days past ovulation) simply because your left boob doesn’t hurt as much as your right. And don’t start taking tests at 5dpo. They will never show up as positive and you will waste pointless tears. My friend Lisa once told me “I would rather be hopeful and positive and convinced I am pregnant for 13 days and utterly devastated on day 14 if I am not, then spend 14 days in nervous, scared anticipation of failure.” I love that and live by that each 2WW now. Embrace the time you have, even if it doesn’t end the way you have hoped.

But my best advice is to stay busy. I have goals to make a 2WW bucket list for my next wait – it will keep me busy and distracted! What about you? What do you like to do to keep yourself busy during the 2WW?

Q: Are there any pills or supplements you have tried that have worked well or that you would recommend?

A: This is a loaded question! I know SO many people have differing opinions on this so I will keep this brief and allow you to do your own research as well, but here’s what I would loosely recommend*: CoQ10 for egg quality (stop taking this once you get your BFP), Vitamin D (studies showing it increases your fertility), Folic Acid/Prenatal vitamin, and Melatonin (said to play a role in hormone secretion and improve egg quality). Now there are always other supplements that others use and try that are still scientifically unknown if it helps increase fertility, but certainly have positive outcomes and stories! Fairhaven Health is an online source for many of these products and I am excited to try some of the products they sent me recently, like their brand of CoQ10, FertilAid (used to enhance fertility and support overall reproductive health) and FertiliTea. I have heard so much about this tea for preconception and am excited to give it a try! I will keep you all up to date with my thoughts but so far, I am impressed!

That being said, it isn’t fair for me to get stuff and not you! So I am teaming up with Fairhaven Health to offer one lucky winner a GIVEAWAY package of two if their most popular products – valued at nearly $100! The TTC Boost Bundle for Her includes FertilAid for Women, OvaBoost, and FertileCM to encourage hormonal balance, cycle regularity, and to promote fertile-quality cervical mucus and the BFP Test Strip Little Bundle is designed to provide you with the ovulation and pregnancy tests, consisting of 15 BFP Ovulation Test Strips and 5 early detection BFP Pregnancy Test Strips. I can’t wait for someone to give this all a try! Thank you to Fairhaven Health for your generous donations – ladies, check them out and enter for this giveaway below! This giveaway will end on Friday as well and the winner will be announced with the Friday Favorites.

Well that’s it! I have managed to tackle 4 questions and I am excited for the next post in this series, hitting questions like How do you ethically handle embryo creation during IVF? and Where do you suggest finding support on this journey? Can’t wait to answer!

Okay without further ado, here’s how you can enter to win the book and the awesome Fertility package! You will enter using Rafflecopter and it’s super easy – just provide an email so that I can contact you if you win for a mailing address. You can earn more points if you follow me on Instagram, share this giveaway using social media, subscribe to my blog, or leave a comment but regardless, everyone still earns 5 free entries! Can’t wait to share these products with you!

Click Here: a Rafflecopter giveaway

* The opinions shared on my blog are based on my own thoughts, experience and knowledge gained throughout this journey. I am not a doctor or health professional so please consult your own doctor before making any changes to your health or TTC plan. It’s important for you to advocate for yourself and make your own decisions based on your health care providers plan.

friday favorites – february 6.

February 6, 2015February 6, 201512 Comments

You guys – your overwhelming support and validation over my last post – relapse – reminded me of why it’s SO important for people to be open, vulnerable and authentic. Thank you to everyone who connected with comments and love. I don’t know whether to feel comforted by or cry over the fact that well over a 100 of you reached out and said ‘me too’. To everyone who understands this feeling, I am so sorry. I am so sorry you have felt this too. Now, I urge us all, don’t get stuck. I know it’s hard, so hard, but please, promise me you will keep moving past the anger. Anger is sticky. Anger is flammable. Anger is toxic. Anger has to be dealt with and is okay to feel, but after a point, we have to dust ourselves off and move past it because otherwise the anger will consume us and we will become permanently bitter. When we begun permanently bitter people, then infertility wins. And under NO CIRCUMSTANCE do we give infertility that power. Stay strong friends and thank you for meeting me in the dirt and reminding me that the roller coasters of emotions are okay.

Now onto Friday Favorites!

Favorite Flashback: This Jimmy Fallon ‘Saved By the Bell’ sketch this week was the ultimate ‘flashback’. I mean seriously, the original cast members are in their 40’s and they were looking GREAT! Such a fun blast from the past.

Favorite Instagram Pin: Wahhhhh! A few people tagged me so that I saw the new show line made by Sahnda Marie Kids. I mean, look, mini Starbucks Velour shoes. If my heart didn’t already ache for tiny baby things, it’s now official. Aching and loving. If only I could justify this purchase. SO CUTE.

Favorite Tip: I have yet to find a brand of gluten free breadcrumbs that I love for cooking so I make my own! SO EASY! I just buy a bag of gluten free bread (I use Udi’s), throw it on a cookie sheet and toast it in the oven, leave it out for a while so it’s nice and crisp, and then pulse it in a little food processor. I sift out the larger pieces and reblend them until all of the toast is finely powdery. Store them in an air tight container and season as need for each recipe. Sometimes I just add a little salt, or some italian seasoning or leave plain – I make up a batch in bulk and it’s fast and easy and has the same consistency as real breadcrumbs.

Favorite Date: I got to spend some quality time with my sister this week which was just the best. We took advantage of a groupon at a local bistro and then roamed the mall while catching up. I am so blessed to have a sister who I can have deep, real, meaningful conversation with and our time together just filled me up. She really is amazing (and beautiful).

Favorite Cali Pic: Cali’s Auntie Bella (yellow lab) drives her a little crazy, but she wouldn’t of course fully admit that. Cali’s hilarious little diva attitude has her thinking that Bella should play by her rules and I actually think Bella gets a kick out of that. This weekend there were two pictures that made me chuckle – the first, Cali and Bella outside. This was taken right after Bella and Cali got tangled up walking and Bella tried to sit on her. The camera came out, Bella turned into a perfect sitting angel and Cali stood there like “what the heck just happened mom?!”

The second picture is from when Cali was sitting on the stairs at the cabin and Bella came down to the top of the stairs and wanted to pass her. Cali just wasn’t having it and was completely irritated by this big dog trying to take her stair space. This series made me chuckle.

Favorite Selfie: I found this awesome fur hat in Josh’s dads truck (SO WARM!) and being the weirdos we are, a husband-wife selfie had to occur. I love this guy.

Favorite Meal: We got to eat halibut cheeks this weekend, caught from an Alaskan trip Josh’s dad was on and whoa, they were delicious! They tasted like crab claw meat and I am drooling thinking about them right now. SO GOOD. And clearly gone fast because I only got a picture of the last one.

Favorite New Friend: Wednesday night I got to spend time with my girlfriends, hanging out around the kitchen counter, painting nails, eating snacks, laughing so hard. Finally around 10:30 or 11, we pulled ourselves from the counter and snuggled up on the couch to watch Man in the Moon when my new BFF, Bentley, came over to snuggle with me. I mean, seriously, if Cali only knew, she would be so jealous, but we won’t tell her now will we?

Favorite Funnies:

That’s it! Hope you have an awesome weekend. I’ll see you next week for our first Q&A series post, plus the first of three February giveaways! YAY! Until next time …

send ’em over.

January 20, 2015January 21, 20159 Comments

I frequently get emails with some awesome questions from readers – everything from “what books to do you recommend?” to “what words do you have for someone going through a miscarriage?” The questions are all SO good and I love interacting with each of you as you pepper me with some thoughtful questions. They cause me to pause and think and that’s a good thing!

My inbox has been especially filled lately (I LOVE IT!) and it has inspired me with an idea for a series of posts – a Question and Answer series! That’s right, all those questions you have been emailing me over the last few years, send them my way via comment or email and I will work my way through them. Don’t make them all serious – send me over some fun, random ones too! :) I can’t wait to address some of the most common questions to specifics about our journey. Faith, treatment, personal life – nothing is off limits!

My email is listed here, you can write it below, or comment on an Instagram post. If you would like your blog tagged back and your name identified, just leave it in the comments (From NAME at XXXX) and I will credit your question to you. However, if you want to be anonymous, that is completely fine as well, just let me know. (First names only will be used.) The question window is open till the end of the month so send them over. I’m really looking forward to this!

Oh and due to a crazy week, Friday Favorites may not be posted until Saturday … just pretend like it’s Friday when you read them. Hehe!

I’ll leave you today with a great message I read a few weeks ago that has been stewing in my brain: “The mention of a journey implies an arrival. If God guides us, however we may dislike it, it means there is a goal to our journey. Because it is God’s will for us to reach that goal, we can be certain we will reach it. We start and stop and change our minds. People disappoint us; we disappoint ourselves and may give up. Not God! He always finishes what He begins.” Rest in the fact that regardless of our outcome, there is an end to this journey and a destination. Chances are it may be nothing like we imagine or plan it to be, but it’s there and it’s going to be glorious. Have a great rest of the week friends!

friday favorites – january 9th.

January 9, 2015January 9, 20158 Comments

Happy Friday! Why not, let’s jump right in!

Favorite Moment: Monday was kind of a tough day for me (see here: outcomes) but Monday night completely redeemed the day. Yes, the new season of the Bachelor started. Now before you get all judgy on me, hang on. One of the reason I love it (besides the cringing drama), is that I gather with my girlfriends and we spend hours eating, laughing, and making assumptions based on hair styles and limo debuts, all while snuggled up on my couch. The best. Thanks Jana, Julie, Anna, Monica and Danielle for being the bright spot in my day and for guffawing with me while taking tedious notes about which girl is who. I love you girls.

Favorite Read the Bible Challenge: How many of you think “ah, I am totally going to read the Bible this year” and then slip off path and get so far behind you ignore the goal completely. Well, you’re not alone! But this year, She Reads Truth loaded a #365day plan in their Android/IPhone app which allows you an easy way to digitally pull up the days reading, scroll through and read it (perhaps instead of looking at facebook or instagram – time management skills learned too!) and then mark it off as complete. If you want to ask questions to the community reading it together, an extra swipe of your finger to the right brings you to discussion boards. It isn’t dated so if you fall a day or two behind, just jump in where you left off. I love it! So download the SheReadsTruth app today (free!) and select the Bible in a Year plan. (There are many great other plans too if you are looking for a new devotional.) Or download the daily assignment list to print off and stick in your Bible if you are a hard-copy reader. Enjoy!

Download the PDF Printable Plan Here

Favorite Book: My sister-in-law finished reading this book and the next thing I knew, it was sitting in my mailbox waiting for me to read. Ladies, if you want a great read, order this book today! What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty is a funny, heartfelt book with an infertility secondary storyline. I must warn you, it will be like reading the inside of your head at times and it can be a little overwhelming (I had to set it down a few times, but in a good, therapeutic way if that makes sense), but it completely redeems itself. Even if you never struggled but like to read, go buy it. It isn’t obnoxious, quite the opposite and I think you’ll enjoy it! Yes, there are a few swear words, but only a few. I loved this book. (Thanks for letting me borrow it Monica!)

Favorite Makeover: Our little ragamuffin furbaby Cali got groomed last weekend. She can finally see again and I think she’s carrying herself with a little bit of extra sass because of it.

Favorite Accomplishment: You know that to-do task that sits on your list for days at a time because you don’t want to do all the work it involves? Well, I got TWO of those tasks done this last week. (Thank you New Years umph!) Josh and I tackled a closet we have wanted to organize for, um, 2ish years, and I finally got my passport sent off to be renewed. I don’t know why it felt like such a project (go get a picture, wait for it to print, make an appointment and go to the passport office, fill out the paperwork, go to the post office ..) but it took about 30 minutes and I am so glad it’s just done. Check, check, and check!

Favorite Memory: Josh and I went to the NHL game last night with my parents, which was SO fun. Chicago Blackhawks (parents) vs. Minnesota Wild (us). I love the light hearted family tension these games create! Sadly, the Wild couldn’t pull out a win but it was fun to see my parents so happy at the Blackhawks victory. It was a great game – a lot of shots attempted (over 60) and good people sitting around us. Two highlights – one, when we looked up at the big screen during a break, we saw a picture of my mom and I flashing up there that must have been taken from Instagram. It’s always fun to see yourself on the big screen. Sadly we have no proof because we were too busy screaming and pointing. Hey, living in the moment, right? Secondly – Josh loves getting popcorn at hockey games. He’s borderline obsessed as he talks about the popcorn days before the game. So he gets his popcorn and I took out a hotdog sized basket of it for me, but of course I got bumped and spilt the whole basket of popcorn all over the guy in front of me. The only thing is, the guy has no clue he has 241 popcorn kernels sitting on his back between him and the chair. So as I begin to panickily remove kernels and apologize (to which he is not hearing me), my mom keeps taking pictures and is laughing hysterically. The row behind her got involved with “I won’t tell him!!!” cries and offers to take better angled pictures of this fiasco. (To which my mother easily accepted and her phone now contains way too much evidence of this incident.) We were all hysterical and when the poor man moved, he got a better realization of the popcorn all over him (and now in his pants). He was such a good sport about it and we got him brushed off with no damage done, but had quite the laugh at my clumpsy popcorn act.

Favorite Thing I am Looking Forward To: Watching the Parenthood episode from last night. It’s sitting on my DVR box and I am typing furiously so that I can go watch it. People, if you aren’t watching Parenthood, you are missing out. Big time.

Favorite Funnies: And now, the moment you have all been waiting for … the funnies!! Enjoy!

Alright friends, until next time …. have a wonderful weekend!

Have you had a chance to click and read my post over at Fertility Authority yet? If not, click here and visit today! Thanks!

keep dreaming.

January 7, 20153 Comments

Hi friends! First of all, thank you all for the support on my first blog post written on Fertility Authority last month! You guys poured out the love (and clicks) and I am SO appreciative. Just think, with every click you made over the last 30 days, you were able to take part in raising money towards our IUI cycles. Now that is pretty cool, right!? I think of you all as I swallow those pills and look lovingly at that trigger shot, hehe!

Well, the time has come for my next post! Same as before, would you guys be just as supportive and head over there to click and read? It’s all about keeping the dreams we have alive despite disappointments. I would LOVE to continue to show them the amazing team I have behind me!

Okay, to read (and support) click this link: CLICK ME! CLICK ME! CLICK ME!

Or here’s the link for copying purposes: http://www.fertilityauthority.com/blog/chelsea-ritchie/2015/1/07/keep-dreaming

As always, feel free to share in any and all ways possible. :) I hope that someone is blessed and encouraged by these words. While I love the self therapy of writing, I am also so grateful for the ability for God to speak to others through our experiences. To Him be the glory!

See you back on Friday for the first real edition of Friday Favorites 2015! Whoooo hoooooo!

Did you miss my last blog post on Fertility Authority? No worries! Click here to read!

yay!

December 19, 2014December 19, 201428 Comments

Who’s ready for some good news???

Yeah, I couldn’t pick just one. That’s how ready for good news I am.

I digress.

So, my appointment today. As you may remember, our news on Monday was a little disappointing. I went into today’s appointment completely prepared for our cycle to be cancelled and for more time to pass before getting a chance to try again.

I was pleasantly surprised.

My lining made an impressive leap over the past few days and for that I was grateful. I have never struggled with thin lining before yet going from a 4 to an 8 in only a few days made me thrilled (triple-lined nonetheless!). We then checked one ovary, the one that had measuring follicles last time – nada. She tried to find a follicle, she really did and came up completely empty handed. Ouch. I wasn’t surprised. Let’s just get this news over with.

Then the other ovary …. What are those!!? Follicles! Nice big juicy (ew) follicles. I think both the ultrasound tech and I were shocked to see them. She was so excited, clicking away and measuring them, announcing that we have 4 follicles between a 15-18 today. YAY! Clearly their growth and development was a result of answered prayers. YAY GOD! Yay prayers! Yay follicles!

I got some blood work done and began the wait for the call … and hopefully a plan!

Driving away from my appointment, I was in total shock. I walked in expecting the cycle to get cancelled and quickly realized that I don’t know how to process good news very well. My heart was still guarded, anticipating the lab results to change everything. I told a friend the other day if I didn’t set my expectations so high then I didn’t have as far to fall. (Isn’t that sad? I know, ye of little faith.) The words from a Jesus Calling post earlier this month echoed in my mind: “I am taking care of you. Every detail of your life in under My control. If you could only see how close I am to you and how constantly I work on your behalf, you would never again doubt that I am wonderfully caring for you. This is why you must life by faith and not by sight; trusting in My mysterious, majestic Presence.”

If we could only see how close He is to us.

I have been reminded this week that is He is so close to us. I continue to struggle with allowing myself to get my hopes up and I think that there is an aspect of hopeful expectation combined with a guarded heart. But today we get to simply celebrate so many answered prayers. We have a chance and God loves to work for His children.

The nurse called back and they hoped my estrogen would be above 150 and it was 75.6, so tomorrow I start estrogen pills three times a day which will HOPEFULLY last through a first trimester. (Lord, please!) (Sidenote: estrogen pills three times a day … yes, Josh deserves some prayers. Buy stock in Kleenex now if you know what’s good for you.) They would like to give the follicles one more day before triggering so TOMORROW NIGHT at 6:30 pm, I have a date with an HCG trigger shot and then Monday morning at 10:30 am we will have our IUI (inter-uterine insemination) done. Oh my word, this is happening.

I get a little emotional when I think about the timing of it all. Christmas 2012 is when we were able to celebrate with our families my first pregnancy, later miscarrying that day, and to think that this Christmas, 2 years later, I will have the hope that God will be creating new life in me again. The sentimental side knows that even though our babies are celebrating Christmas with Jesus, that perhaps He will be lovingly creating their sibling to join us next year. Cautious excitement and gentle reminders that He is constantly working on our behalf.

Send all the baby dust, prayers, positive vibes and fertile juices my way. I wholeheartedly believe He is in this …. YAY!

(Oh my, this post is painfully scattered but I just don’t have the brain capacity to edit it. Thanks for bearing with me when some days the sentences just don’t flow and my love for GIFs are on overdrive.)

XOXO!

road bump.

December 16, 2014December 16, 201426 Comments

print from http://www.hollyholtdesign.com/shop/

You know what’s a hard prayer to pray? This one. “Not my will but Yours be done.” After a disappointing cd10 (cycle day 10) ultrasound yesterday, I felt utterly defeated. Sometimes it can be really easy to trust when I anticipate things going according to my plans and then when they don’t, well, it gets a lot harder. But here’s what yesterday taught me – He is still in control and even when I’m upset at how much body is (or isn’t) working, He hasn’t failed me and He is still good. It can be really hard to hang in there when I can’t see the other side but isn’t that what faith is? Hebrews 11:1 is a verse I cling to often – “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” And so we continue to press on, acknowledging our disappointments and communicating them to Him while still believing in His power, goodness, compassion and love for us.

For those who are interested in the medical talk about what’s going on, let’s just say the letrozole didn’t really do its job creating follicles. I only have a few tiny ones, most measuring about a 6-7, one 10 and that’s a stretch. My lining was a 4 and typically it has been much closer to a 9-11. My estrogen is low, hence the tiny follicles and non-existent lining. Impossible to turn around? No, but given that we only have a few days to do so, it’s not incredibly likely. The doctor wants to do one more ultrasound on Friday before canceling the cycle and we are hoping that we can still salvage this cycle. Worst case scenario is we just wait it out and possibly use Provera to induce a period if I never ovulate naturally, so given true worst case scenarios, this is nothing comparatively. Best case scenario is things look perfect on Friday and we can trigger (hCg shot) that day and have our IUI on Sunday. I don’t want to waste money on the shot, ultrasounds, blood work and IUI if things aren’t as they should be though. This is my first cycle with this new RE and we are still building trust so I am not entirely sure what to think at this point. Stay tuned.

But like I was saying above, I HAVE to remember that He is in control and that even if I wasn’t expecting the news to be what it was, He wasn’t surprised. After all we have been through, I knew my heart was more guarded going into the appointment, anticipating what could be but also hopeful, as femara/letrozole has always worked on me in the past. Being prepared for disappointment and experiencing disappointment rarely is as easy as it seems. I feel a little lost as to what to expect from this cycle now. I can only lean back into the fact that God called us back into treatments, of that I am so certain, and so I can only wait for Him to provide for us in the ways He sees fit.

He can still work a miracle. And if not, there’s always the next cycle. My impatience is shining through though. How much longer is this going to take?

fertility authority.

December 3, 2014December 3, 201427 Comments

Happy Wednesday! I am SO excited to share with you my first post over at FertilityAuthority which goes live today. YAY! I am thrilled about this opportunity to write for this website, which for those who don’t know, is an online source for fertility information. They offer some great tools and resources for those being diagnosed and going through treatment and one of the ways they offer support is through a handful of bloggers. Yes, yours truly is one of them starting today!

So here’s what you can do – simply click here and read! Without further ado … here you go!

http://www.fertilityauthority.com/blog/chelsea-ritchie/2014/12/02/i-have-infertility-i-am-just-you

I love being able to write and share my heart with a new group of readers, however know that this commitment won’t interfere with my writing here in any way. It’s simply another opportunity to connect with me (and me with you!)

And can I beg? Even if you aren’t in need of this website, I would GREATLY appreciate your click and support. I would love to come out of the gates with my community strongly behind me (and yes, I do have a minimum requirement of hits that I need to get) so your click does mean a lot! Thank you in advance for the read, shares and comments! :)

Secondly, we heard back about my blood work results last week and while we weren’t really sure what we were hoping for, we did get some answers. My results came back showing a severe Factor V Leiden mutation which essentially is a rare (less than 3%) mutation where my blood develops abnormal blood clots and is known to cause reoccurring pregnancy loss and late pregnancy miscarriages. The good news is we finally have an answer which is a gigantic answer to prayer. While this mutation can’t be “fixed”, it can be treated with twice daily injections to thin the blood, therefore lessening the chances of blood clots, particularly to the uterus while pregnant.

I was a little overwhelmed when the clinic first called with these results but was quickly reminded by my amazing support team that this answer is a blessing and the success stories once diagnosed are impressive. Even more so, I was reminded that God eats odds for breakfast and that who we serve has abilities far greater than this mutation. In fact, I am fearfully and wonderfully made and this diagnosis doesn’t come as a surprise to Him! So with that, we are stepping forward with faith that this answer is the key to unlocking a miracle.

My last day on active birth control pills was LAST NIGHT (arghhhh!) which means we will likely be starting our IUI cycle in the next few days. CRAZY! Can’t wait to keep you all posted on the exciting happenings as we walk with God back into this treatment pool and await His perfect timing. Join us in prayer, will you? Pray then click the link above. :)

Thanks my friends, for your faithfulness to our journey. We adore you guys and are so thankful for all the ways you partner with us.

“I thank my God every time I remember you.” Philippians 1:3